King Solomon talks about the importance of leaving an inheritance for our children but remember that interference can mean so much more than money.
1. Shared Vision & Values: Regarding strategy, relationships, work ethic, money, and success
2. Shared Influence: Across generations, among spouses, and among siblings/cousins and geared to individual capabilities
3. Valued Traditions: That are characteristic of this family and set it apart from other families
4. Receptivity to Learning and Growing: Being open to new perspectives and new approaches; embodies a critical orientation that underlies mastering change and overcoming obstacles
5. Investment in Relationship Enhancement: The most robust families have traditions and mechanisms they use to play together and enjoy one another; these accumulated playful experiences serve as a buffer during difficult times
6. Demonstrative Caring: Open demonstrations of empathy for family members during good times and bad; making the clear statement, ”You are important to me.”
7. Mutual Admiration: Earned by building trust, based on a track record of being consistently accountable and true to your word.
8. Being There: Especially at times of grief, failure, or embarrassment; how a family interacts with a distressed family member is highly correlated with long-term family harmony and business success
9. Maintaining Space: Respect for individual privacy and for the privacy of each family unit within the extended family constellation
10. Circumscribed/Managed Conflicts: Feuding members all too frequently bring in ”reinforcements”. The family needs to know how to prevent members, who are tangential to a given conflict, out of the middle and then address the conflict with finesse.
How are you going to make sure that the heart of your original legacy is passed on to the next generation? How do you want to set them up for success? Pulling together this group of positive interventions with outside help can make so much of an important difference. Reaching out beyond the family can give you the leverage to steer all of you in the best direction.
